Hence baby girl Osborne. I was too immature to accept his last name. Actually, Mary Maness just doesn't sound right. It sounds a little too 1950's June Cleaver to me. One upside to the last name Maness is that it's one "D" short of Madness, which is very appropriate at times. We had a last name.
Some of the first names that made our list (though we disagreed on some of these) included very funky, quirky names, like Phoenix (as in my child will rise from the ashes of my broken body as a beautiful phoenix) and Zora (the dawn...as in the dawn of a new chapter of our lives). We also considered Aradia (the queen of the witches...however, once we discovered that Aradia was also the name of a pole dancing fitness gym, we immediately took a pass). See? Girl names are hard! We considered Charlotte, but it was rising in popularity too quickly for my tastes.
I liked Hallow and Harlow, but was overruled on both. Besides, when I really started thinking about it, could you be president with a name like Hallow Maness? Don't answer that. Also disregard the fact that people could twist that into "hollow anus". I was pretty good at coming up with insults to accompany names. If it could be readily twisted, it was out.
That brings us to the hospital. When I went into labor, baby girl Osborne still didn't have a name. Baby girl Osborne arrived on 12/21/2008--still no name. We started working really hard on figuring out what to call this beautiful little girl.
My paternal grandmother's name was Betty. She was often a curmudgeon, but was also often spirited and funny. She was a big part of my life considering she lived with us. I really like old fashioned names, and it turns out, Adam kinda liked the name Betty, too. When I told my sister we were considering Betty, she got upset and said that she wanted to name her first born, Betty. I told her to beat me to it...
We decided that if it was going to be Betty, we were going to modernize it a little and make it Bettie with an "ie". Sure she'll be forever cursed by not being able to find a mug or a keychain with the proper spelling, but that's small potatoes for a lifetime of having a cool name.
There were several things that solidified Bettie for us...signs, if you will. First, Bettie Page. If you've never heard of Bettie Page, Google her. She was a gorgeous 1950's pinup. She was, unwittingly, at the forefront of the women's liberation movement. She passed away on 12/12/2008. A sign? Maybe.
Second, on my birthday, 12/23/2008, Adam came blazing into the hospital saying the world needed another Bettie. Apparently there'd been a silver alert on TV earlier for a missing Betty. They did end up finding the missing Betty. Adam just knew that was another sign.
On 12/24/2008 we were getting heat from the hospital administrators about getting our child's birth certificate filled out. We had a first name, but no middle name. It was almost like being back to square one. Finally I asked Adam what he thought of the middle name Paige (get it? Page?). He thought it was cool. It made Bettie's name quirky, but most people wouldn't get it. If she got older and hated her "Edna" name, Bettie, she could go by the more modern Paige. Baby girl Osborne finally had a name! Bettie Paige Maness.
My father-in-law hated it. When we told him that one reason we liked the name Bettie was that it hadn't appeared on the social security administration's top 10 list in 50 years (we wanted something somewhat unique, but not too far out there), he said: I can see why! To me, that just meant that the name was perfect!
The weirdest comment we've gotten about her name is this: I've never seen an infant named Bettie before. My reply? Do you think Betty White started out as a Golden Girl?
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